A profound shift in family dynamics is emerging, as highlighted in a Business Insider report. Millennial parents express feelings of being “abandoned” by their baby boomer parents, who are now favoring travel and personal endeavors over traditional grandparental roles. The contrast is stark when compared to previous generations, as exemplified by Kristjana Hillberg’s childhood experience of being cared for by her grandmother. Nowadays, arranging visits with grandparents requires planning months in advance.
Leslie Dobson, a Los Angeles-based psychologist and a millennial mother herself, has observed a growing resentment among millennials towards their parents. This resentment stems from the perception that the older generation prioritizes their lifestyle over bonding with grandchildren. Dobson interprets this as a “three-fourth life crisis” among boomers, a desperate grasp to live their best lives in the face of mortality.
This generational gap was personally felt by Dobson when her 71-year-old father chose to relocate to a luxury resort in Mexico. While initially disconcerting, Dobson and her siblings eventually came to terms with their father’s decision, despite wishing for more support in raising their children. Contrasting this viewpoint, Ted Dobson, Leslie’s father, asserts that he maintains efforts to visit his grandchildren, although their busy schedules often hinder these plans. He also highlights the generational disparities in lifestyle and resources, pointing out the comforts millennials enjoy, such as nannies and luxury vehicles, which were not as prevalent in his time.
The University of Cambridge conducted a study revealing that, by age 35, millennials are more likely to be in debt and less likely to own homes. However, middle-class millennials have amassed more wealth than boomers had at the same age. Interestingly, a Fortune survey earlier this year found that 35% of U.S. millennials still rely on their parents for financial support.
Another area of contention lies in differing parenting styles. Dobson notes that millennials often perceive boomers as too harsh and not adept at nurturing young children. This has led millennials to seek parenting advice online rather than from their parents, as they prioritize gentle and trauma-informed approaches to child-rearing. Daniel Cox, director of the nonprofit Survey Center on American Life, emphasizes that millennials seek consistent and stable emotional support, particularly due to the high costs of childcare and demanding work environments.
In summary, the Business Insider report sheds light on the evolving intergenerational relationships between millennials and baby boomers, underscoring differing values, lifestyles, and expectations that shape modern family dynamics.
